The Awkard Botch

A few weeks back, I began what I hoped would be a regular feature on The John Larroquette Project called Awkward Moments. My first entry on this topic was devoted to the Awkward Tinkle. Today’s is called Awkwardly Botching a Big Announcement.

Sunday was a shooting day for Rock TV, and after we finished, a small group of us went out for dinner to relax and celebrate being done for the day. My friends Leroy and Todd (Scotty Poppenjaws) were there, along with Rachel and our married friends Ryan and Arlene. We were going on about something or other, and the topic briefly paused on the topic of our friends Laura and Ryan who had a baby last year. I briefly paused asked, “Is there another married couple at the Rock who have gone ahead and actually had kids once they got married?” As I paused to think about that, Arlene popped up, “You’re looking at them.”

For some reason, the concept of Ryan and Arlene being pregnant seemed so far out of the realm of plausability that it felt appropriate for me to abruptly change the topic of conversation. My friend Todd and I started talking about something else, I can’t remember what, and I just remember there being an odd vibe at the table at that point.

Later on, when I got home, I happened to remember having seen ultrasound pictures on Ryan and Arlene’s fridge that day. I talked to my friend Matt on Monday and he mentioned that they were pregnant, and suddenly it all painfully came into focus.

This Awkward Moment also falls into the sub-category of the Delayed Gratification Awkward Moment – where you don’t realize how awkard it was until a day or two later. I called Ryan yesterday to congratulate him and laugh about the incident. I didn’t get to talk to Arlene, but I plan to drag out the awkwardness with her as long as possible. I hope to wait until she is about 8 months pregnant and then toss out an offhand comment that perhaps it’s time for her to give the Atkins Diet a try.

That should be plenty uncomfortable. :)

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11 Responses to The Awkard Botch

  1. Ted & Kimber, Jeff & Kim, Kevin & Dawn, Dale….

  2. Ill Mitch says:

    Hey, cool.
    Now we don’t have to tell everyone in person. I’m going to start sending out the link to this blog instead… :)

  3. Adam says:

    Thanks for this, Peter. I’m glad you are my awkward brother in Christ.

  4. peter says:

    Yay! A comment from Ryan (Ill Mitch)! That’s a first.

    Go back into your hole now, Ryan.

  5. Ill Mitch says:

    I commented on an older topic under a different pseudonym today as well.

    By the way, why have you not yet blogged about Ill Mitch? Or have you, and I missed it?

  6. Geof says:

    You are an evil bastard, Peter.

    I love you.

  7. peter says:

    No, I haven’t blogged about Ill Mitch yet, but I will soon. It has been added to the docket.

  8. Scotty Poppenjaw says:

    I still tell people about the most award thing you ever did to me Peter. Remember the time in the mens room at church I was standing at the urinal, and you came up, stood right next to me, and began fixing my hair, telling me how pretty I was???

    Oh wait that wasn’t you at Church, that was Armando at the Stillwater Penitentiary…. Whoops my bad… Shoot!! Oh well, It’s to late to go back and erase it.

  9. Ruphqut says:

    I hope you meant awkward, not award, Todd.
    Nice freudian slip though.

  10. Scotty Poppenjaw says:

    No I meant award… Oh but I see where you’re going with it. What with this blog about Awkward moments and all that probably would have fit pretty well. Shoot I missed a perfect opportunity. Good eye.

  11. Geof says:


    Docket, docket, docket.

    Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, docket.

    Viva le JLP!

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