There’s a girl who I work with who won’t leave me alone.
This girl (who we’ll call “B”) insists on getting my attention somehow every time she passes by my cubicle, which averages about 25 or 30 times a day, it seems. Even if she’s 15 feet away, she’ll still say, “Hey Peter!” and wave until I acknowledge her. Today she thought it was amazing that we each wore jean jackets to work, I replied by saying, “We’re twins”, and she laughed hysterically for 10 minutes. Recently she passed by my desk and asked how I was doing – as a friendly joke I replied, “I’m lonely.” She laughed and went back to her desk and wrote me this email:
“I just wanted to pinch your cheeks when you said that. It was soooooooooo cute!”
It was among the more awkward emails I’ve ever received from a co-worker.
I should clarify that I’m not mean to this girl, I just feel a bit unenthusiastic about our friendship. Her seemingly overwhelming desire to become my good friend (and more) has made me suspicious – it’s like Groucho Marx’s old quote, “I don’t want to belong to any club that will accept me as a member.”
I’ve been trying to find some opportunity to drop the girlfriend bomb on her to throw her off the scent, but I haven’t had the chance to yet. I’ve thought about saying, “Hey B, your annoying giggle reminds me of my girlfriend and how she doesn’t annoy me,” but I haven’t had the opportunity. I might also try, “Wow B, being around you reminds me of my girlfriend and how I’m actually attracted to her”, but again that seemed a bit overly mean (not that that has ever stopped me before).
Any ideas on what I should do? Should I continue being innocuously nice to B in hopes that she’ll grow weary? Should I insult her in a memo? Should I get a huge picture of Bridgette and put it in a frame that says, “THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND!” and place it on her desk? Would that be too subtle?