Somebody needs to explain to me what has happened with Steven Tyler’s face
Did he just Botox the hell out of it? Is that a lift? Did he go into the plastic surgeon’s office and ask to be given the face of a demon? I need answers, and I need them quickly because the hideousness of his new face has kept me awake for the past few nights. His unnatural eyes stare back at me in my nightmares, beckoning me to join them in Hades. Clearly Joe Perry and Roger Daltrey aren’t too pleased about having to stand so close to him, either. You can see the dread and discomfort behind their stiff smiles. My guess is that moments after the photo was taken, Daltrey vomited in utter disgust at Tyler’s appearance.
And then there’s this picture:
Is it just me, or did the plastic surgeon also seem to provide Tyler with a pair of small breasts? He probably put them in after realizing how badly he botched Tyler’s face, and figured that he’d just go all the way in attempting to create a body so revolting that a series of natural disasters might come about because of it. I’m serious, I wouldn’t doubt it if somebody told me that his new disgusting face and figure caused a tsunami wave to obliterate a small Pacific island. Pete Townshend looks like Brad Pitt compared with him.
I’m warning all of you right now, if Steven Tyler and Joan Rivers were to make out with each other the universe would collapse in upon itself and all life would cease to exist. This is known as the Omega Scenario. We must all work together to ensure that this will never occur.