So apparently my blog entry from yesterday made many of you uncomfortable with its unwelcomed intimacy. For that, I am truly sorry.
I’m sorry I tried to express my warm regards to you in the only way I know how. My behavior comes from my upbringing and other various factors beyond my control. It simply isn’t my fault that my attempts to kiss you on the mouth with my full, moist lips somehow made you uncomfortable. I have come now to understand that all that I know is wrong, and the ways that I choose to express my personality are somehow frowned upon.
I suppose things would have been worse had I continued on to straddle you in affectionate friendship and presented you with a charcoal drawing I did of me without my shirt on. I can only assume that you would have grown “uncomfortable” with my actions and asked me to stop running my hand along your belly. Well, if this is the response I get for being friendly, then I may just have to stop being nice and go back to being quiet and aloof in public situations!
I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that. I really do want you to like me and return my physical treats. Kissing the neck of my friends is my love language. It’s just not something I can just change overnight (though maybe if you stayed with me overnight then I could get it out of my system for a while).
Anyway, please accept this apology.
Can I hug you again?