Engagement

Congratulations to my lovely sister Julia, who became engaged with the handsome Matthewon Tuesday night! Hooray for everything!

juliaring.JPG

Congratuations to the two young lovebirds! I hold aloft an ivory goblet, brimming with rusty ale! Let us drink deep from the salad bowl of life’s essence! Let the bones of my enemies be snapped in half in celebration of this momentous day! May their soft, gray brain tissue be chopped up and distributed lightly on a crunchy Mediterranean salad, like feta cheese from the bowels of perdition! Let us tear lions asunder!

Huzzah!

Happy birthday, you guys.

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7 Responses to Engagement

  1. jonathan says:

    Matthewon Tuesday is a great name. Congrats to the future Mr. and Mrs. Tuesday.

  2. Julia says:

    Wow, Peter, this is just…well it’s just lovely. I’m just in tears. I knew you’d know what to say! And this is why you’ll be the first to give a toast at our wedding!

  3. _steve says:

    Happy birthday???

  4. Thom says:

    This post is really lacking in violence, Peter. I am a bit…disappointed. But congratulations to Julia and Matthew anyways.

  5. Chris says:

    Peter,

    Please pass on congratulatory gestures and platitudes to your sister from me. Though I’m happy to hear of the engagement, I also offer condolences on the apparent loss of Julia’s left pinky finger.

  6. Adam says:

    Nice work, Julia! :)

  7. Jake says:

    Julia,
    Congratulation. I am so happy for you!
    Matt,
    What the hell are you thinking? Seriously. I have been married for three long years now and swear to you on the graves of my ancestors IT IS NOT WORTH IT!! Throw any antiquated ideas of honor and dignity out the window and run and don’t look back lest you turn into a pillar of salt!

    Good Luck (Matt)
    See you on campus
    Jake

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