Scamming Caribou

I am writing this from the parking lot of a Caribou Coffee in order to use their free wi-fi. This way I do not have to purchase a beverage!

Sweet, free wireless connection! So precious in your speed and lack of security! Truly I tell you, there is no feeling like that of slightly ripping off a coffee chain.

There is a man in a nearby car who just made eye contact with me. Who is he? Does he see what I’m doing? Is he a scout from Starbucks? Is he an internet thief like me? Does he hope to somehow lure me into the back seat of his car and initiate some sort of physical intimacy? I am uneasy with this scenario.

I just gave him the finger. So much for that dude. Chalk another one up for me (Peter: 900, Everybody Else: 4).

By the way, the other great thing about stealing wi-fi is that it automatically makes your blog entries hilarious. It is literally impossible to dispute that statement.

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10 Responses to Scamming Caribou

  1. Ted says:

    Flicking someone off is the ultimate diss… I mean, what are they going to do then?

  2. Caribou manager says:

    I can see him out there…yeah, he’s doing it…nobody uses our bandwidth and gets away with it…Dennis, call the police.

  3. Obsidian says:

    Miss Minnick doesn’t need to call the police. I can see her coming out to throw a cup of used coffee sludge on you and your computer.

    She’s the Caribou manager who can beat up any other Caribou manager.

  4. Adam says:

    I love it when people give people the bird. It is so lazily contemptuous.

  5. Ted says:

    Lazy comtemptuousness… now you are living the dream Adam.

  6. Pat says:

    “Michigan Man Fined for Using Coffee Shop’s Wi-Fi Network”
    http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,276720,00.html
    Ooh, felony charges…

  7. Thom says:

    From above article: “Peterson, a 39-year-old toolmaker, volunteer firefighter and secretary of a bagpipe band, wanted to use his 30-minute lunch hour to check e-mails for his bagpipe group.”

    If that does not scream “Internet Stealing Thug”…I don’t know what does.

  8. tim hopps says:

    ok, we’ll give you the 900. how did we score our 4?

    i realize i’m way late on responding so no one will see this.

  9. tim hopps says:

    c’mon, let’s have a new post. what the heck else am i supposed to do here at work?!!

  10. Sarah says:

    You can guest blog T.H.
    Just start another long comment and make it a blog entry of sorts.
    Hope your show went well last Friday.
    I feel like I haven’t seen anyone from the Rock in forever.
    I’m going to try to make your shin-dig Saturday.

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