Pointlessly Piling On

You know what was a good movie, and in no way a cynical miscalculation?

Dick Tracy.

Perfection.

You remember how a distant 1930’s comic book hero that nobody under the age of 50 was familiar with was resurrected for a big-budgeted 1990 film aimed at adolescents? Do you remember how the film starred Warren Beatty, whose name just screams “teen box office attraction”?

Do you remember how the film wasted a phenominally weird performance by Al Pacino by having him act opposite extras from the Star Wars cantina scene?

Do you remember how Dustin Hoffman helped out his buddy Warren Beatty by doing a cameo as the gangster Mumbles, who speaks in a slurred mutter, which is apparently different than how Dustin Hoffman usually talks?

Do you remember how rapt attention was paid to the movie’s celebrated color palette inspired by the 30’s comics while apparently no note was given to the fact that the movie was a joyless exercise to begin with?

Do you remember how the film prominently featured Madonna, whose presence has never benefitted a single film in the history of cinema?

I remember all of these things. I’ve probably thought about the Dick Tracy movie every day for the past 18 years. I watch it in its entireity every weekend.

On an unrelated note, my priorities are completely in order.

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5 Responses to Pointlessly Piling On

  1. scott says:

    i remember getting the soundtrack on tape. i don’t remember why though, i never really liked the movie that much.

  2. tim hopps says:

    i’m baaaaaack! having moved into a new office, and things being
    crazy, i haven’t checked in with the JLP for some time. there’s no way i’ll ever be able to catch up on all the ones i missed, so i’ll have to hope that it’s been stale and unfunny for the last 3 weeks and i didn’t miss anything. can anyone verify this?

    i saw Dick Tracy when it came out. my foremost thought was that Warren Beatty was selfish in casting himself because he was too old at that point to play the role. hey, i’ve accepted that i’m too old to be a rock star anymore, why couldn’t he think in like terms??

  3. Guy Incognito says:

    You’ve still got the moves, though, Tim. Maybe he thought he did too.

  4. Adam says:

    I saw this movie when I was a teen ager and I remember being confused by how… crappy it was. Thanks for the bad memories, Pete. Oh and if you need 8 dollars I can help you out.

  5. Thom says:

    I am a bit sad you make no mention of Mandy Pantinkin, William Forsythe or Jack Kehoe. All turned in masterful performances.

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