This morning, as I gazed admiringly at my body in our bedroom’s full-length mirror I happened to overhear a commercial for a new Aveeno skin product. Being the rapacious lotion-hound that I am, my ears perked up as I surveyed their new wares.

Over footage of smooth, bronzed, lithe legs not unlike my own, the voiceover intoned that Aveeno’s new moisturizing lotion featured “soothing oatmeal essence”.
Uh, what?
Not quite sure if I heard correctly, I listened on as the commercial cited Aveeno’s patented “triple oat formula”. Oats? That’s what we’re hanging this ad campaign on – oats? Is this an Amish product or something?
You know something I’ve never thought? “Hey, you know what has really great, healthy skin? Horses. What do horses eat, anyway?”

Having said that, if Aveeno could somehow hook me up with a pair of massive, dripping horse nostrils, I’d be much obliged.
I compared labels with Aveeno vs Target generic brand in a bolltle that looks like Aveeno. It’s exactly the same stuff only Target is much cheaper.
Now I don’t have to lather my face and hands in my maple and brown sugar oatmeal anymore.
I love my horse snot Chapstick.