Inaccurate Hamburger Musings

Guess what I had for dinner tonight?

Hamburgers!

Flesh of the Sin-Beast

These weren’t regular hamburgers, though! There wasn’t any ham in them at all! These hamburgers were made with meat.

Bridgette told me that the meat came from a cow-beast. I asked her why the cow had to die. She said because of me.

My dead cow.

I guess I feel bad about the cow. I also feel bad about the genocide of 500,000 Armenians during World War I. We all have regrets.

Thank you for your ham-meat Mr. Cow! I will eat one of your friends tomorrow, and then you can writhe in torment together with him in cow hell, you vacant-eyed bastard!

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3 Responses to Inaccurate Hamburger Musings

  1. Talat Pasha says:

    What Armenian Genocide?

  2. peter says:

    Uh, I mean to say, “Hooray, Ottoman Empire!”

  3. tim hopps says:

    And if God didn’t intend for animals to be eaten, then why did he make them out of meat?

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