Let me understand this correctly, a Colorado man has perpetrated a hoax by which he pretended to accidentally launch a helium-filled, UFO-shaped balloon into the sky? And the balloon was supposed to somehow contain his six year old son? And the intended outcome of this stunt was to net an offer for a reality show for his family?
And wait a minute, he named his son Falcon?
Kudos to this guy and his family for the bizarrely-complex, yet utterly illogical scheme! Why not involve some sort of alibi involving the Mexican drug cartels while you’re at it? Perhaps that would be too R-rated for his presumptive show’s intended audience of suburban gossipy housewives addicted to TLC? If that’s the case, why not incorporate an advice-dispensing, flamboyantly gay man who is improbably adept at grouting ceramic tile? Maybe this guy’s failing was that he didn’t dream big enough!
On the other hand, what has our country come to when I can’t trust a man who looks me in the eye and tells me that his foolishly-named son is flying through the stratosphere in a homemade balloon? Maybe I don’t want to live in a world where reality television has forced us to question everybody’s motives. Back in my day, when Fonzie told Ralph Malph to sit on it, Ralph Malph sat on it with his honesty and integrity intact.
I just want my America back, and I want people to stop faking that their kids are floating away, and I want everybody to stop having so much sex with each other. Is that really too much to ask?