Law & Order Pleasantness

There’s nothing like a Law & Order marathon to make you feel all warm and smushy inside, is there?

They don't believe you.

Law & Order has everything I love – grizzled irony, child rapists, and characters who lie. On top of that, each episode features more unexpected wrinkles than Willie Nelson’s anus. Every version of Law & Order runs like clockwork, starting with an incident of unspeakable cruelty and ending with some lucky guest star shouting in a courtroom (somewhat like Willie Nelson, though to a lesser degree). It’s twisted, televised comfort food, like maple-flavored cat excrement.

As the hours pass by during a Law & Order marathon, we the viewers begin to take on the characteristics of the show. We greet strangers with cynical suspicion, we squint our eyes skeptically, and floss our teeth with incredulity. We respond to moments of significance with narrow-eyed, incisive comments and resolve ethical dilemmas with physical force and tough words, totally unlike Willie Nelson.

Hooray for Law & Order marathons! They make us awful!

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4 Responses to Law & Order Pleasantness

  1. M says:

    “more unexpected wrinkles than Willie Nelson’s anus” – greatest line ever

  2. tim hopps says:

    I agree with M. I feared after having a kid you might tone it down a bit, but i’m glad to read that you are still desperately ill.

  3. Thom says:

    Law & Order Marathons give me hope in the human race. I love watching those murderes, rapists and child molesters stick it to the man.

  4. Sarah says:

    I’m a “Law and Order” marathon junkie….and suspicious of everyone I meet now.

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