Back in 2004, I wrote a smug little post about Brett Favre having tossed up an idiotic interception at crunch time in the playoffs.
In 2008, I took more digs after it appeared that another foolish interception in a Packers loss in overtime of the NFC Championship game would be his last throw as an NFL quarterback.
Then tonight, with 19 seconds to play in a tie game and the ball on the Saints 38 yard line. Favre rolled out to the right, and instead of taking the 5 or 6 yards of open field, he threw a stupid pass back into the middle of the field to hand the ball and the momentum back to the Saints. On a night when the Vikings had dominated every statistical category except the all-important turnovers, their two biggest players couldn’t carry their water, and all my years of mockery washed back over me like a tidal wave of urine from drunken Wisconsinites.
Now I lay prone, soaked in bitter irony and long-prophecied sorrow. I will fight my way through this unhappy night and arise tomorrow a new, stronger man. Though this blog’s bad karma hath wrought a severe punishment upon Vikings fans, I will continue to carry on writing distasteful blog entries that nobody enjoys reading. I am oblivious to the lessons of defeat, much like the liberal wing of the Democratic party.
So tonight, I say, “See you in hell, Brett Favre. I no longer hate you, but neither shall I ever again snuggle into your whiskery affections.”