Good news, everybody! Oliver is now a man.
A fully grown, Chipotle burrito man.
It all happened so fast. It was literally just yesterday that he was unable to sit up on his own power, and now he’s drowning himself in a fat wad of rice, pico de gallo, and seasoned meat like an a hyena ripping apart a common housecat.
Cherish the days with your young children, my faithful readers. Before you know it, they’re eating enormous burritos and taking online courses to become veterinary technicians.
The world is moving too fast for me. Guards, remove these readers from my presence! I wish to retire to my sun porch and be fanned by one of my faithful domestic servants.
I’m so hot! Guards, come over here and unsnap my shirt!
I, Chester Alan Arthur, have spoken!