Odds & Sods
Fred Bassett is consistantly one of the funniest comics out there, albeit unintentionally.
I read Fred Bassett just about every day, and I always end up laughing out of confusion and sadness for the artist who devised them. My only guess is that this poor guy is so past his prime that he doesn’t even think to incorporate humor into his strip. The jokes end up being something like this:
panel one: A scene of a nice day
panel two: Fred Bassett says “I should very much like to go outside!”
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!! Yes! He wants to go outside! It’s so perfect!
Here’s a recent strip for your enjoyment and confusion:
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Lastly, my brother Brian recently wrote a poem inspired by that same post, and I felt behooved to share it with all of you. It comes from the depths of his tortured 18-year old soul:
I walk into the street, and it greets me
With its evil fingers of warmth and pestilence
It slyly caresses my exposed flesh, teaching me the true meaning of terror
For years i have tried to destroy its evil presence
Have tried in vain to rid the earth of its greatest rival
But it has forever met my attempts with laughter, and additional warmth
Slowly emitting radiation to destroy my deliciously white shell
O thou cunning adversary, why are you impervious to my outrageous
plans for your destruction?
Already it has enslaved our brothers, the plants, infusing them with chlorophyll
If left unopposed it will make us share their plight in constant
servitude to its vile existence
Even as we speak, we march towards certain peril
As our marvelous automobiles erode our only defense against the sun,
the ozone, letting the sun’s poison slowly melt our precious ice caps
The bane of all life
The opposite of all fun
My consternation of thee is perpetual, O enemy of all mankind, the sun
There, the decks are now cleared. Regular posting will begin again on Monday!
Categories:
Thank you Peter!! I was quite enjoyably confused!! and I love the new header…..that was a great post!
Anyway, I haven’t heard from you yet and was wondering if you recieved my “ransom” note??? or maybe the used tape wasn’t strong enough to hold it and it went *shooooooop* under the fridge?? I dunno, but if you need or want the “souvie” back……
I was told however by my accomplice that you have several so we may just have it nicely framed. Impressed by the cleanliness by the way…well, enjoy your day …..I’m off to go buy me some pickles!
Greetings, my stalking friend.
I did indeed receive your note, which was met with a smile and alarmed confusion. You are welcome to keep the Welmore Mile flyer as a reward for your sneakiness.
A note to all other potential stalkers - I am no longer accepting applications for stalking positions. I have decided to take on a girlfriend instead. I will keep your resumes on file should an opening for a stalker become available in the future. Thank you for your interest!
Matt Terry’s coolness has reached a new level. Anything you can have in common with him is to your advantage. Peter, now that you have a stalker, you and Matt can raise a toast to being desperately wanted. Because having a stalker (and hating the sun) makes you cool.
“My only guess is that this poor guy is so past his prime that he doesn’t even think to incorporate humor into his strip.”
Why don’t you pick on some crippled people or orphans while you’re at it; you hillarious, soulless, bastard.
http://www.lambiek.net/graham_alex.htm
P.S. can you get your web guy on the fact that one can not copy text off of your site without resorting to nefarious techniques such as View > Source. The Internet was invented for the fullfillment of lazy people; lets do our bes to keep it that way, ‘k?
LOL! Holy crap dude!
I’m so happy that I inadvertently mocked a dead person!
I’ll see you on the softball field tomorrow, my friend. Old scores will be settled.
I’m finishing up the Vinegar & Salt potato”e” chips from last nights small group, and I just realized they taste like pickles.
Just thinking of you Peter.
You know what chips taste even more like pickles? The pickle ones.
P.S. can you get your web guy on the fact that one can not copy text off of your site without resorting to nefarious techniques such as View > Source. The Internet was invented for the fullfillment of lazy people; lets do our bes to keep it that way, ‘k?
What browser are you using? I have no such issues highlight, copying, and pasting text.
I use IE and I can’t ever cut and paste on Peter’s blog. (I noticed this because I have a habit of highlighting the text I am reading, and I can’t do it here.)
Sorry to make such a mundane comment. It’s probably about as funny as that comic strip, though.
I’m using IE6 sp1. Now i can sort of highlight text on the coments page, but only from response 2 down, and the other problem is that when i click and move my mouse; no matter where i move it, it selects all of the text from that spot to the end of the page. Very strange….. Also, i can highlight and copy text that i’ve typed in the comment box, and i also have no problems with highlighting and copying text on the right menu bar (i can even copy that picture where peter looks all paranoid like he thinks that there’s someone behind him taking his picture…)