Brogan
I went bowling on Saturday night, and it was good.
I did not bowl as myself, however. I am but a mere mortal in the divine tragedy of bowling. When I bowl, I assume the identity of a hearty, confident beast of a man. I become Brogan.
Brogan is a man both large in stature and in volume. As Brogan, the level of my voice raises 15 decibels and I punctuate my sentances by pointing my finger aggressively at whomever I choose. Brogan’s bowling strategy is all about velocity. He likes to whip the ball as hard as he can with little regard for aim or favorable outcome. Brogan just goes in with guns firing and lets the pins fall where they may. In the case of Saturday night, the pins mostly just stayed standing as the ball rocketed down the gutter.
Brogan also don’t like to be told what to do. If you try taking Brogan on, you’re liable to end up face down in the Caspian Sea. Brogan will seriously hurt you. It’s bad.
As my bowling-mates found out, Brogan also likes to scream a lot as he’s releasing the ball. It’s because he’s so strong and virile, the power just has to come out somehow, Brogan-style.
Later on, Bridgette told me I can’t be Brogan anymore.
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October 18th, 2005 at 8:37 am
Thank God for Bridgette.
You two make a perfect pair, and this story proves it.
I can’t wait for your wedding.
October 18th, 2005 at 9:40 am
I hope Brogan bowls awkwardly with his left hand. That always makes for good laughs.
October 18th, 2005 at 1:12 pm
its like the witness protection plan at bowling alleys across the country, nobody ever uses their real name.
October 18th, 2005 at 1:27 pm
I agree with Scott. I worked at a bowling alley for 2 years. The names people use often astound me.
As for myself, I use the name “Scotch”. People think I have a drinking problem becuse of this.
October 18th, 2005 at 2:07 pm
i’m usually clint eastwood or some other movie name. you wouldn’t believe how many people come up asking for an autograph.
October 18th, 2005 at 4:48 pm
This Bridgette chick is cramping your style. Maybe you should lie her unconscious on the side of the road with a “Free Bridgette” sign pointing at her.
October 12th, 2007 at 9:40 am
[...] Bowling with Brogan All about velocity Confident beast of a man Will seriously hurt you [...]