The Moment is Now
Come and sit with me. I would like to speak with you.
I want you to know that I find you an exceptionally good person. You are kind to others, and your grooming leaves no doubt as to the quality of your caliber. Your smile makes birds sing songs of finest beauty and your forearms are firm and muscled, though not to the point of unsightliness. Your eyes meet my gaze evenly and your mouth parts slightly as you await my next words. You are, in short, as fine an individual as I have come across.
Are my kind words making you uncomfortable? Perhaps you would like it if I didn’t lean in so closely to you when I spoke? Is my breath hot on your face? Do you dislike being able to see individual pores on my skin? Am I breaching your personal space by placing my nose two inches from yours? Are you uncomfortable with the fact that my hand is currently placed on your left thigh?
Do not misunderstand me. I do not intend this as a sexual advance in any way. I simply find you a remarkable person and desire closeness with you. As I lean in to softly kiss your lips, I want you to understand that this will merely be a lingering kiss of friendship and respect. I believe you will find it both supple and refreshing.
Let’s begin.
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August 30th, 2006 at 9:19 am
This is one of those posts that originated as some crazy shit you said to Bridgette, right?
August 30th, 2006 at 10:29 am
This conversation would probably merit a night spent on the ol’ couch.
August 30th, 2006 at 10:47 am
Even in text, I find this conversation disturbing and uncomfortable. My personal webspace has been violated.
August 30th, 2006 at 11:04 am
I, too, feel totally disgusting right now.
August 30th, 2006 at 11:37 am
This was more awkward when he tested it at a Rock TV editing session last week.
August 30th, 2006 at 11:52 am
This is why Celeste doesn’t link to your blog.
August 30th, 2006 at 12:31 pm
Thom, I’m telling you this concept would go over great at the Rock.
August 30th, 2006 at 12:41 pm
“I need an adult! I need an adult!”
August 30th, 2006 at 1:05 pm
I can see where it might be effective within the new house churches format…
August 30th, 2006 at 1:47 pm
It’s all about building intimacy.
I’m considering having Mark Darling play the lead role.
August 30th, 2006 at 2:50 pm
i’m with sarah….my webspace was violated and i literally made a disgusted face. like someone who hates mayonaise makes when they witness a flunkie at subway squirt mayo on their meatball sub.
August 31st, 2006 at 6:50 am
I, for one, thoroughly enjoyed myself. That is, until I read these comments and realized that maybe I shouldn’t have…:oops: