This might be old news around the Twin Cities, but it was just too beautiful for this blog to pass up.

Apparently a 1,700 pound bull went berzerk at the State Fair last week and then killed itself.

In a brief, frenzied moment, an angry bull charged through the fairgrounds, barreled past fairgoers, butted a faded red fire hydrant and died. No one was injured. And no damage was done to fair exhibits. “Even our fire hydrant is OK and good to go,” said fair spokeswoman Brienna Schuette.

Holy crap. Not even at my most inspired could I have imagined a scenario where a massive bull went insane, burst away from its handlers, stampeded furiously through a crowd of fattened onlookers, and then crushed its skull against a fire hydrant. I mean, honest to God, what would that have sounded like? Like a coconut? A watermelon being dropped from the roof?

I wish I could just think up something like that. Honestly, it would make me a happier person.

Good thing about the fire hydrant still being okay, though.