Blobfish Redux
Guys, I’m sorry, but I really think I have to revisit this:
Seriously, what in the hell are we looking at here? So many questions haunt me when I consider this disgusting abomination…
The website called it a blobfish. Is that its actual name? Would any other name be appropriate? The JonLovitzfish?
What is that little tendril of nastiness trailing out of the corner of its mouth? Is that leftover from dinner at P.F. Chang’s?
Look at this thing. Look at its gray, soulless eyes. What sort of intelligence lies behind them? Is it self-aware? Has it looked in a mirror lately? Has it considered laying off the 20-piece McNugget meals?
Did Jim Henson create this thing the morning after his wife left him?
Look at its filthy, slimy mouth and jowels. Imagine it calling your name in a soft, clear voice. Now imagine it barfing out an inside-out rabbit. Imagine it urgently pleading with you to shoot it in the head. Now imagine yourself pulling the trigger and watching this fat bastard’s guts spray against the wall like they hit the back of a jet engine. Do you feel remorse? No, of course you didn’t. That’s nature.
Okay, I think I’ve got that out of my system. I think I’m ready to move on to other topics.
Next time Matt Terry redesigns this site, though, we’re using that blobfish photo. Maybe we’ll swap his head for Ben Franklin’s.
See you in hell, blobfish!
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October 16th, 2007 at 10:19 am
I think it’s more like a Danny Devitofish.
October 16th, 2007 at 11:17 am
I am really a big fan of blobfish. It totally is whatever JLP is all about. Jim Hanson reference, and good inside-out rabit imagery when speaking of puking. B+.
October 16th, 2007 at 11:22 am
It’s actually a deep sea fish know as the Pale Taft.
October 17th, 2007 at 12:10 am
i’m still having trouble understanding the anatomy of this fish
is this the whole body, or just the head?
and was this picture really taken in the sea? it looks like someone threw it on the felt table after waiting in line at target for the family portrait picture guy. didn’t the guy have any toys on standby to get a pleasant smile for the christmas cards?
also, this picture will be central in my christmas cards this year, along with the caption, “it was a bad year to be exposed to fatal amounts of radiation. merry xmas to those who survived”
October 17th, 2007 at 1:37 pm
it HAS to have been the inspiration for the Ween song “I Can’t Put My Finger On It.” check out the song, you’ll know what i mean.
of course, i’m back from vacation and catching up on old blogs, so no one will see this comment anyway. darn.
October 19th, 2007 at 6:22 am
Peek-a-boo. I see you!
October 19th, 2007 at 6:24 am
Also, this post has my vote for a Best of JLP post.