Come! Trudge dead-eyed into the courtyard for another forced viewing of a new Rock TV!

This was a fun little idea for a Hallween video that we wrote and produced alongside our If You’re Not Getting, Get Going! video. Unfortunately, a bit of bad administrative work by me (exacerbated by the fact that apparantly I’m busy now) meant that the video got bumped from the Rock’s service the night before Halloween to make time for some silly little thing where two new pastors were officially recognized by the church.

Regardless of the scheduling snafus, here are some of my thoughts on the newest Rock TV:

-While I find the finished video to be a bit choppy and unclear at points, there are certainly elements to it that I love. As usual, Todd’s trailer trash testimonial performance demonstrated his uniquely talented abilities to deliver a laugh. His “my cats just love my new leg nub” is by far my favorite line in the video.

-The dark tone in the second half of the video is something I liked. Some members of the ministry worried that it was getting too dark and grim for church-laughs, and so we leavened it a bit with some lighter music at points. That probably helped, but I wonder if it might have been more fun to go “all in” on the violence and death (not that it would have been any more popular).

-The production of this video was a personal challenge for me because I was making a very conscious effort to step back and allow others to take the lead in writing, production, and editing. I’m usually a notorious control freak in this ministry, but that doesn’t really bode well for the future of Rock TV as my free time gets more and more eaten up with family endeavors. This video represented a worthwhile opportunity for others to edit and make the sorts of decisions that I usually manage. It was hard, but very good for me. Kudos to everybody that put in work on this one.

-When we were in production with this one, I summarized it to my wife as “an infomercial for an excercise product that’s really just a psychopath with a chainsaw who chases you into shape”. After she watched it, her only comment was, “You never actually show him chasing anyone”. Leave it to her to point out the massive, gaping hole in the video that nobody in the ministry seemed to notice. Thanks, honey.

Gather near, slobbering troll-beasts, and writhe in the presence of the new Rock TV!

This is another of our ham-fisted “message videos”, similar in approach to the old “Jaded Dating Tips” video we did back in 2005. While perhaps a bit more hard-hitting than other message videos we’ve done, it is also admittedly a hodgepodge of ideas. Some of the gags reflect Adam O’s paradigm of the Bible Ass-Man who uses scripture to challenge people’s pain and politics without any sense of empathy. Other gags (not-so-subtlety) go after the “feel good all the time” school of Christianity that tends to breed rampant church-hopping and consumerist mentalities.

Also, it features jokes.

By far, my favorite part of this video is the dream sequence about 4 minutes into the video. It’s a wonderfully surreal aside that interrupts the established pacing of the video for no reason other than to be strange. Other favorite bits are Leroy’s obnoxious prayer ambiance and his sadness at erasing his sin-free record. Overall, while probably not one of our top 10 efforts, I feel like this video is solidly consistent, with enough good lines and tossed-off gags to keep a smile going throughout.

Enjoy, and stay tuned for the next new Rock TV, coming this Halloween!

Behold, two more warm globules of spittle from Rock TV’s unhygienic mouth!

Roomies (1999):

Crow Motel (2002):

These two gems represent my final efforts of my summer archiving project to tweak old Rock TVs and make them available online. In my opinion, I was able to save the best for last. These two represent my favorite efforts by the Rock TV ministry from the years before I was involved, and they required minimal adjustments before making them available here (I removed one or two awkward camera shots).

The Roomies video is flat-out great, in my opinion. There’s literally no concept here, and that is absolutely a strength of the video. Just two dudes being goofy and dancing and then getting the crap kicked out of them. Rock TV actually attempted to do a sequel of sorts to this project a few years back, but wasn’t able to catch lightning in a bottle the way this one does. When we tried it again, it just seemed really, really flamboyantly gay.

As for Crow Motel, I just think it’s a great, really bizarre idea. Definitely a bit darker than the videos had been up to that point. It certainly isn’t without its flaws, but it’s got enough wonderfully strange stuff (“From the makers of the Crow Swatter…”) to make it all worthwhile.

Enjoy – we’ve got a brand new Rock TV coming very soon!

Behold, two more moldy morsels fallen from the unkempt beards of the Rock TV gods!

The Road Trip (1999):

The Road Trip 2 (2000)

Back in the early days of the Rock, these were perhaps the most beloved Rock TVs of them all. They were each played to kick off the big summer retreat (back when we had Rock retreats) and the audiences were rabidly enthusiastic at that moment, so they went over really well. When I reflect on these particular videos (I was merely a fan of Rock TV at that point, not a member) I remember the goofball energy of the retreats that these helped stoke. They aren’t necessarily the strongest videos in the world, but they were important for the ministry, and for our church.

The first Road Trip video is a pretty straightforward deal – “Hey Rock TV gang, let’s pile in the car and head on down to the Rock retreat!” For a number of technical reasons, this is the best-made of the early Rock TVs. The highlight for me is certainly the performance by Todd, who had just joined the ministry, particularly the shot of him in the darkened trunk – in fact, that’s one of my favorite shots in the history of the ministry.

The Road Trip 2 probably remains the most ambitious project Rock TV has ever attempted. Portions of the video were filmed in Arizona and Germany (Todd grabbed them on his world travels). More notably, prior to the retreat the video was only completed up to the 7:35 mark of what you see here. Everything after that was a closed-circut feed taped at the actual retreat itself as the video played. I was in the auditorium when Todd popped out of that box, and I can tell you that the reaction was epic.

However…

…I’m not convinced that Road Trip 2 is a particularly funny video. It’s a bit too self-congratulatory and reliant on callbacks to earlier videos (including the Road Trip, Mattress Police and Ninja Salesman) and there just aren’t many jokes. Still, the video was an impressive technical feat (and the fact that they beat the hell out of a car for a Rock TV is pretty cool).

NOTE: I’ve shortened Road Trip 2 by nearly two minutes from its original length, both to avoid some issues with copyrighted music (the sound is a bit peculiar on this version, unfortunately) and to remove stretches of the video where nothing happened.

Enjoy!

Two more soggy leavings from the Rock TV litterbox!

The Viewmaster (2005)

100 Years of the Rock (2003):

These two videos aren’t quite as old as some of the other videos from the archives that I’ve been dusting off, but they’re each worth revisiting.

The Viewmaster video left a bad taste in my mouth for a long time because we just didn’t execute it properly. I went ahead and removed a lengthy set of Leroy-as-dog gags that never really worked, and the video is MUCH better for it. It feels faster, sillier, and certainly closer to the original vision of the writing team. This shortened version of the video is quite strong, in my opinion.

The 100 Years video was flagged by YouTube last year for using copyrighted music, so I’ve removed the offending song, and removed about 30 seconds from the rest of the video. While this one is a bit plodding, it has its merits. Jeromy Darling’s performance as the old-timey preacher at the beginning is great, and this video features the first appearance of Pastortron 9000 and the Jesus Cops (characters we later expounded upon upon at length).

Back when the 100 Years video first aired (at the 2003 Rock retreat) we caught some flak for Todd’s performance as an increasingly-drunk host. Looking back, we might have been a bit insensitive, given the number of recovering addicts in the audience, but it’s still a damn funny job by Todd.

Enjoy!

Two more scrubbed-off nuggets from the Rock TV mines!

You’ve Got Male (2000):

Band Auditions (2001):

Both of these videos pre-date my involvement in Rock TV, but I went ahead and shortened them up substantially, cutting out almost two minutes each. I always liked elements of these videos, but felt the final products were a bit bloated. Hopefully, the edits have salvaged the worthwhile material while keeping them understandable.

You’ve Got Male features yet another virtuoso performance by Leroy, and I think the second half of this video is really strong. The highlight for me is definitely the awkward, profound moment of silence near the end.

Band Auditions is a harmless, goofy video that works fairly well. Shelly’s performance is spectacularly weird – probably her funniest stuff from any of the old videos.

Neither of these comes close to a Rock TV top 10, but both merit being available online. I’ll have a couple more oldies for you guys next week.

Enjoy!